Birth Dynamics Childbirth Article Archive

The Husband Support Role in Labor

There was a time when the husband's role in labor and childbirth was delegated to the back waiting room. The scene was one of an anxious Father pacing the floor with a cigar in his mouth. He was out of the loop. He was clueless and powerless. His wife left to labor and birth by herself.

Times have changed and even in the hospital circles it is very rare for the husband not to be involved in the labor and birth of his child. In the home birth realm, the husband usually plays a vital role in the birthing process. Husbands are encouraged and often looked to as the main support during childbirth these days.

Husbands have regained much lost ground and become active in the labor support role. This is a vitally important role as no one on earth can fill the place of the husband to his wife who is experiencing such a life changing event: the birth of their child. It is a truly intimate experience that solidifies the bonding between husband and wife in relation to the entire pregnancy and birth process. It has now come full circle: the conception of the child, the months of pregnancy, the expectation of labor, the experience of birth, the joy of new life.

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During labor the husband can offer much support and effective encouragement to his laboring wife:

  1. The husband offers emotional support like no other. He alone has the oneness with his wife to be able to read her emotions and know how to effectively encourage her even if it is just a simple, "I love you." or a hug.
  2. The husband is able to give labor support just by his physical presence whether that be someone to lean on, someone to hold her up, someone to support her while she takes a hot shower, someone to give encouraging words.
  3. The husband acts as a buffer between hospital staff and his wife. He answers questions. He makes decisions for his wife and family.
  4. The husband offers a tremendous amount of relief from pain to his wife whether it be from a lower back massage to relieve back pain, counter pressure on the lower back during a contraction, massaging feet and hands to aid in relaxation, holding his wife's hand for reassurance.
  5. The presence of the husband gives his wife a peace and comfort by knowing that she is protected and loved.

Husbands should be encouraged to take an active role in the birth of his children. Childbirth classes are an excellent way for the husband to become more involved in pregnancy and childbirth for first time dads. Many times the husband would like to help during labor but doesn't know what exactly he can do. Childbirth training will give the husband and wife an incredible amount of knowledge about the birthing process but also practical how to suggestions on the logistical aspects of labor.

Husbands: You play a vital support role during labor. Involve yourself and interact with your wife which will give her the confidence she needs to complete the work of labor and birth. Do not be offended if she yells at you or puts a fist in your arm or says, "This is all your fault!" ! Sometimes labor can be so overwhelming, you may be honored to take the brunt of her frustrations. Hang in there. Give her physical support and emotional encouragement. This provides a much needed security during a time when your wife feels most vulnerable.

Practical Advice -- What you can do:

  • Avoid chit chatting during labor contractions. This is highly annoying to a laboring woman.
  • Bring a tennis ball or other massage balls or rollers to massage her back.
  • Do not forget that in addition to food for the laboring woman, food for dad is vitally important. Fruit and healthier snacks and drinks should not be forgotten. There have been many a times where the father forgets to eat or finds himself running out for food at 12 am midnight only to find cold stale fries and a old rubbery hamburger at some fast food restaurant. Don't forget to bring a small cooler of food and drinks.
  • Bring all necessary paperwork and books to read or videos to watch. Bring a change of clothes for yourself as well. Wear comfortable shoes.
  • Monitor the amount of visiting people. Protect your laboring wife from unexpected "visitors" and "onlookers". Labor is not a family reunion party. If you are at a teaching type hospital and are asked if 11 interns may watch the birth, you have the right to say "No".
  • Monitor phone calls. Don't chat on the phone during labor contractions or surf the web during contractions.
  • Have a helper. Running errands, moving the car, going to get the children, calling people. You need to be able to tend to your wife.
  • Talk to your wife during labor. Don't just sit there like a bump on the log. Interact. Talk. Encourage. Pray. Listen and make wise decisions.
  • After the baby is born, you may ask for the newborn exams to be done in the room. You may refuse routine procedures that you feel are unnecessary or not for your family. Don't be afraid to ask questions and let your requests be made known.

The husband support role in labor is vital and necessary in childbirth.

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